Islam & My Parents

This post is prompted by something that happened this evening. My mom and I were in the kitchen this evening when my baby brother, who is in his crib, starts to cry. He had a doctor’s appointment today and the two shots he got put him in an irritable mood all day. He was tired and supposed to be asleep so for a few moments, nobody moves to retrieve him. I can tell that my mom is tired after dealing with a cranky baby and the rest of the kids all day; I know that she’d love nothing better than for me to go to the baby and calm him into sleep. I didn’t go. The baby’s cries got louder and with a sigh of frustration my mom left the kitchen to tend to the baby. I feel both guilt and shame. It would have taken me barely five minutes; instead, I ignored my mother and her needs. Moreover, I think I added to her burden by the lack of consideration and caring reflected in my actions.

And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him and [that you show] kindness to parents. If one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor repel them but address them in terms of honor.
(Quran, 17:23)

I believe in God’s command to worship none but Him and to treat one’s parents with kindness. Note that belief in one God is the foundation of Islamic belief. The Muslim declaration of faith states, “There is no deity worthy of worship but Allah and Prophet Muhammad is His messenger.” (Allah is the Arabic term for God). Now, notice that the command to worship Him alone (the basis of Islam) is immediately followed by the command to treat parents well. The two are inseparable and this reflects the value Islam places on parents.

Once again, I am reminded of Robert Munsch’s book Love You Forever because it highlights the compassion, patience, and love of a mother for her child – things that can be appreciated but never repaid in full.

In my Islamic studies, I learned stories and sayings that demonstrate how good treatment of parents is rewarded with God’s blessing. Prophet Muhammad said, “May he perish… He whose parents (one or both) attain old age in his life and he does not enter Paradise because of his goodness towards them.” Among the prayers that God is sure to accept, according to Islamic teachings, is that of a parent for their child.

Thus, I believe that my relationship with my parents can place me in either heaven or hell. More than kindness, it is also gentleness, honor, and consideration with which I must treat them. When in spite of my deep love and respect for them, I am tempted to lash out at my parents (whether I am in the right or wrong) or ignore their needs, it is this belief that serves as a reminder to me and keeps me in check. For all the other times, I hope that my parents forgive me.